Just Finished: 007 LEGENDS

Wow, Jaws looks way more realistic than Bond here...

...oh, right.

Released October 2012.

Published by Activision.

Developed by Eurocom.

Version played: PlayStation 3.

As you might have noticed, 2012 represents the 50th anniversary of the James Bond movie franchise (not the books, they're older).  To be honest, I've felt the festivities to be a little lacking on MGM's part - sure, we got Skyfall and the full series Blu-Ray set (on the Christmas list!) but those could have come out any year.  Hell, the BRs should've been out sooner, I've been waiting far too damn long for 'em.  Still, at least other groups tried to do something a little special to mark the occasion.  Some of them were great fun, like the Top Gear special with Richard Hammond squeeing over all the old cars of the series.  Others, however...

...that would be 007 Legends.

Please Make BEWARE THE BATMAN Not Happen Again

Now, after my Smallville comics post, you may think that I am not someone who has any business getting up in arms over some change to the Batman status quo - and honestly, I'm with you there.  I am very much in favour of new approaches where this character is concerned, especially if they take us in as un-Nolan a direction as possible.

Even so, there is a line that shouldn't be crossed.  And with the upcoming animated series Beware the Batman, someone at DC or Warner Bros. has just skipped merrily over that line without a care.  For evidence, I summon forth a recently-debuted character focus sheet, found in a recent issue of a DC Nation kids' magazine by the folks behind the DC Women Kicking Ass Tumblr:

Can't see the problem yet?  Let me take a page out of CSI here.  ZOOM.  ENHANCE.

Alfred's preferred weapon is a f***ing pulse rifle.

A pulse rifle.  Which, let's be clear, is a gun.  A gun being used by Batman's butler/assistant/best friend.

Remember how Batman's parents died?  Remember how awful that was for him?  Remember how it basically made him vehemently opposed to the very idea of ever using a firearm?

And boy I really hate it when I have to use Frank Miller as

an example of Batman done 'right'...

And yet, here he's totally okay with letting Alfred tote an automatic rifle.

No.  No.  That isn't 'interesting new take', it's a violation of the character's foundations and it's utterly pointless.  You want to have an Alfred who's more action-oriented, who helps Batman out of tough scrapes by throwing down with the bad guys?  Sure, you can have that, but there's no reason he has to do it with a gun.  Just have him wail on guys with a golf club - or, given that here he looks the spitting image of The Goon, his enormous ham-fists of justice.  But not a gun.  Never a gun.

And yes, I'm sure that (this being a kid's show etc.) the rifle will be some sort of non-lethal tazer thing rather than a Colonial Marines-endorsed murder machine, but it's still providing all the wrong sort of imagery for a Batman ally.  And I really have no clue why it's happening here.

I just don't want it to ever happen again.

TEKKEN TAG TOURNAMENT 2: Character Endings in Review (UPDATED)

Okay, so Tekken Tag Tournament 2 has been out for long enough now that I don't feel like an asshole for talking about the endings.  All (well, nearly) of the game's gargantuan roster have received their own individual CG ending cutscene this time around - no more all-in-one film for ChrEddy and other clones! - and, on average, the running time for each has expanded.  More importantly, IMO, they're a much more varied bunch tonally and artistically than the disappointing haul from Tekken 6.  So, I'm gonna go over them one at a time and offer my thoughts on the content, style and general quality of each and every single one.

Two things in advance, though.  One, I'm not posting the actual vids here - it'd clog up the post.  If you want to look them up without bothering to play the game yourself, you lazy so-and-so, I recommend the YouTube channels of Robert Cram or Bloodburger1.  Two, there are still several characters yet to be unlocked on my version of the game; my pre-order codes got me Kunimitsu and Ancient Ogre but not Michelle Chang or Angel, plus there's Violet, Dr. B and Unknown who have yet to be added in.  When they appear, I'll update this post accordingly.  (UPDATE: Got them added now!)

GET READY FOR THE NEXT BATTLE!